Self-Conscious Writer here.

So as some of you know I'm at University for a Bachelor of Arts. This involves taking a wide variety courses, such as english, history, anthropology, political science, and many other silly courses. These courses have very little in common except for the fact that in all of them you will be writing way too much. Some times I can't believe how much stuff I have to write. Luckily I'm a pretty quick writer. I can usually hammer out a 10 page research paper in a few hour-long sessions. The problem I have though has nothing to do with the amount of time I take, it's about what I write. Since I've never actually failed a paper I assume I'm at least a decent writer, but almost every time I have to hand in a paper I do it shamefully with my head down.

It's been a long time since I've felt really proud of something I've written before I hand it in. Sure, after I get it back and the prof's given me like 80, than yes, I am proud of myself. But the problem is I require the reassurance of the prof to tell me what I've written is good, most of the time I have no idea and I assume the worst.

This is why whenever someone offers to edit or read my papers I usually turn them down. I feel ashamed of my writing, like if someone were to read it they'd forever judge me. Recently such an offer was made, but this time I'm going to take him up on his offer. It's not just because he happens to be a poli-sci major and has already done the class I'm in, it's because I realized it's stupid not to get someone to at least proofread a paper. Almost every paper I've gotten back the prof has said "make sure to proofread carefully," but I just ignore it. I laugh it off and continue to ignore peoples offers for help.

It's interesting that this is the way I feel yet this blog has become one of my favourite ways to kill some time. I think writing this and realizing people are going to read it is kind-of therapeutic. It's like if you're afraid of heights you climb the highest building, if you're afraid of bugs... you get a bug. For me it's the fear of people judging my writing, so judge away.

There's racism everywhere!!!!

So as previously mentioned I'm in a pop-culture studies course. Last week we discussed racism in television shows. We were given two examples Friends and Sex and the City, according to my prof both of these shows are quite racist. He explained to us that because neither of these shows feature a minority as a main character that makes them racist. I was very troubled to hear this. I don't care if Sex and the City is racist, that show is pretty terrible, but Friends? That's one of my favourite shows! I refused to believe that one of my favourite shows was racist.

Let's take a look deeper into my professor's lesson. If a show does not feature a visible minority as a reoccurring character, uh-oh, it's racist. I apparently like a lot of racist shows. Think about your favourite show... You got it? Is there a minority as one of the main characters? If you said yes, congrats you're not racist, but if you said no... I've got some bad news for you...

If you haven't guessed it by now, I think this lesson was garbage. Just because a show doesn't have a main character that's black, or Asian, or whatever, that doesn't mean the writers specifically said "there is no way that Joey is going to be black!" I'm not saying there aren't any racists in the television business, I'm just saying it isn't fair to jump to that conclusion.

This leads to a pretty undesirable end. If this is how you determine a show is racist, you're asking them to put in a token character simply because he's a different race. What is more racist, not hiring a minority because there was a better actor that just happened to be white, or purposely hiring a minority solely based on his race? Pretty sure the latter is much more racist.

Another discussion that came up from this had to do with realism versus progression. That question was basically should a television show use a stereotype or not. Let's take the stereotype of Middle-Eastern cab drivers, if statistically in New York there is a majority of Middle-Eastern cab drivers should the show feature that. Should the show follow that statistic and be realistic or should the show avoid any sensitive issues. This is an interesting topic. Personally I think people need to stop worrying so much about these things, most television shows were not made to be this deeply read. I can't believe I'm paying for this class...

Political Science and why I skip it.

So as previously mentioned, I'm a university student. I've got a pretty heavy course-load this semester and occasionally I will skip a class or two. What I find the most interesting about this is what class I decide to skip. It's almost always my Political Science course and I don't really know why. I don't particularly hate that course and it isn't even at a weird time. It's 11 to 1230 on tuesday and thursday, and I'm already there for Anthro earlier. But so far this semester, probably like a quarter of the time I just go home at 11. This is also one of the worst classes to skip as I find out when I have to write a paper for him. His papers are unlike anything I've ever written. He doesn't want us to do any research other than the stuff he assigns us, he doesn't care if we cite properly as long as we cite somehow, and he even said we could write it in first-person. I've never heard a prof say things like that. First of all the research thing isn't that odd since we usually have like six articles to read anyway, but the not citing properly? If there is one overlapping thing I've been taught by all my profs is that citations are the most important thing in a paper and if not done correctly you could be expelled for plagiarism. But this guy just says "whatever, just put a last name." Then the whole you can write in first-person. If there is a second overlapping thing I've been taught by all my teachers since like grade ten is that you never write an academic paper in first-person. But I digress, his papers are weird and based heavily on lectures and discussed readings, so I shouldn't skip this class, I know that, but why do I?

Lets take a look at my other classes that I rarely, if ever, skip. I have an english literature that I have yet to read anything for, an Anthro that I kinda enjoy, a history that is excruciatingly boring most days, and an english pop-culture studies. I've never missed anthro, I've only missed the english lit once to work on a paper, and then I've missed three of the history and other english course. If I had to pick my least favourite course it wold have to be history, and even though this course is in the afternoon and I could easily just go/stay home, I don't. I go to the class, I sit through 80 minutes of who knows what, and I almost always complain. Another class I really should be skipping is my english-lit. First of all I almost never read whatever we're talking about, and secondly it is my only morning class on monday, wednesday, and friday. So if I skipped the class I could sleep all morning! But I show up for the hour consistently.

I've thought about this for a while and I've deduced  the reason to why I skip poli-sci and no other course. It isn't about how much I enjoy the course, it isn't about the professor, it isn't even about the time. It's about who's in the class with me. This just occurred to me recently but in every one of my other classes I have at least one friend, and even though during the class we obviously don't talk, that bit of communication before and after the class keeps me coming back. I've noticed that, unlike high school, university for me is a lot less social. I have yet to make any real friends at university and the only people I talk to are the ones I've known since high school. In poli-sci I don't know anybody so even though I don't think about it that way, I find no reason to go. But on tuesday night at 5:30 when I have to go to class, I don't mind cause I know I've got a buddy in that class. This has been an eye-opening revelation. Maybe I should make an effort to make friends in poli-sci...

More than just a day off...

So today is an important day. It is Remembrance Day. This day comes around every year and I am always not too sure what I should be doing. I almost hate that we get this day off from school because how many people forget why they don't have school? How many kids are playing the new Call of Duty that always comes out a couple days before Remembrance Day? I'm not saying it should be classes as usual today, but the importance of this day cannot be forgotten. This is something I almost forgot this year.

At UBCO they also gave us Friday off. They did this and called it our "Mid-term break" for this semester. So now everyone has a four day weekend. This makes it even easier for this day to get lost in the shuffle. I was talking to a friend of mine a few days ago and he made a good point. He said that wrapping up Remembrance Day with Mid-term break waters down the effect of Remembrance Day. I agreed with him, but I couldn't help but wish Remembrance had happened on a Tuesday cause that's my busiest day. I immediately regretted saying that. This is more than just a day off. I shouldn't be wishing it was on a different day because it isn't about the day off. It's about honouring those who served/ are serving our country. I hated that I thought about it that way.

That is what got me thinking about this. How many other people are just thinking about it as a day off? I know when I was young I knew what Remembrance day was, I'm sure most kids do, but did I really understand the importance? I doubt it. In all honesty I probably was one of the kids playing that new video game. It wasn't until like high school that I would make a conscious effort to wear a poppy and think about the day. Even in high school I never attended a Remembrance day ceremony other than the one at school. So did I really get it? Do I really get it now? I've been wearing my poppy for the last week or so and I attended the ceremony at the university but what else? I know whatever I do on this day is not going to be enough to properly honour the men and women that we owe everything to.

Parking Lots: Where Society Breaks Down

So yesterday I had to go to the mall to pick up a present for my buddies' birthday. I figured it wouldn't be too bad cause all those young-ins would still be in school, and my problem has nothing to do with the mall itself being busy, it's the parking lot. I usually hate parking lots, there are a few I despise, Plaza 33, Walmart, but the worst has to be the mall. I entered the lot over by Sears and drove over to the Chapters/The Bay lot and in that very short trip I had way too many close calls. People constantly cut me off, stopping wherever they felt like, and not abiding by any laws whatsoever. Combine this with pedestrians crossing everywhere and you have the most stressful 5 minutes I have ever spent in a car. I have a few pet-peeves when it comes to driving and almost all of them come into play within a parking lot. Like I hate it when people just throw on their hazards and think that gives them the right to stop wherever they want. Or when pedestrians cross wherever they want. If you're on a crosswalk I'll stop for you but if you just stand on the side of the road less than a block away from a crosswalk, there is no way I'm stopping for you.

I like to think I'm a pretty good driver but parking lots are the most painful experience I have to deal with on a daily basis. Granted I don't have a very hard life but parking lots aren't helping anybody. They're like the perfect storm of bad driving, crazy j-walkers, and total anarchy. Parking lots are where society breaks down. If an alien race was watching us in a parking lot they would deduce there is no intelligent life on this planet.